A few days ago a friend of mine gave me an excellent piece of advice. She said, "Make a list of at least 10 exceptional qualities that you possess, and put it on your bathroom mirror. Then say them out loud to yourself every morning. That might sound hokey, but women don't hear often enough what they do well, or what is good about them. That means, sometimes we have to say it about ourselves."
Being the happy-go-lucky person that I am, I said, "yeah, I need to do that!" So I did. You don’t have to limit your list to 10 things, though, I ended up with 11 and over time will probably add a few more.
Now, I would like to emphasize the importance of two things:
1. Put Your List On a Mirror
To be exact, putting your list on THE mirror, you know, the one that you look into the most often, the one that you endlessly criticize yourself in- that mirror. And don’t say you never look in a mirror because I won’t believe you… unless you’ve removed all mirrors from your house and then I would highly recommend getting psychiatric help.
Also, placing that list of all the marvelous, amazing, extraordinary things about YOU on your most popular mirror will make it always visible to you. This way it will remind you how great you are! And that you need to do the following:
2. Say the Words Out Loud
Every morning when you see your list say every item out loud. Yep, it feels silly, yep, it may feel like you’re lying, and yep, it’s uncomfortable, but that’s the whole point! Saying the words out loud is to over come all those negative thoughts that are trying to control and eat away at your self esteem. You are a wonderful, beautiful woman! You have amazing qualities, talents, and features. Believe in yourself!
Hearing ourselves actually say the things on our list triggers something inside us that says, “Yeah, I am all that, AND a bag of chips!” But just when we accept this truth the wicked witch of negativity swoops in and starts blasting a load of evil spells at us. Some of the common spells she uses are things like:
“Biggest Nose, Ever Spell”
“Major Fat Butt Spell”
“Spell of ‘If Only…’” (i.e. if only I weighed less, then I’d look good; if only I was taller, then I’d be thinner; if only I didn’t yell at my kids, then I’d be a great mother)These spells have devastating effects because they are spells of mass destruction! They wipe away our feelings of self worth- so take a stand for yourself! Defy the witch by rejecting her evilness and then embrace all the wonderful things about yourself. That means repeating your list at least every day, better yet, every time you see it: when you’re doing your hair, make up, or brushing your teeth- okay, that might not be the best time to say your list out loud, so think it in your head.
Also, when you’re saying your list out loud look yourself in the eye. I know it’s hard and will take some practice, but you can do it! Don’t you want to feel better about yourself? Then become a true self patriot and give yourself what you need, which is praise. When was the last time you praised yourself (and not in a sarcastic way), meant what you said, and then accepted it!
As a special note, several of the items on your list should be about your wonderful, physical traits because, as my friend advised, “so that you can make sure your brain is not saying, ‘Yeah, yeah, yeah, but what about....’”
Now go do it right now... you know you wanna!
Updated: Oh! And I think every woman should have in spot #1 or #2 "I am a beautiful woman!"