Ay yi yi

I sometimes think that I am NEVER going to reach my goal. However, recently I have had to stop and think about my progress, and have realized a few things.

1. Even though my progress isn't showing physically, (as in how I look, per se,) I am certainly able to do alot more than I have been able to do for years. I can walk around the zoo without dying. I made it through the botanical gardens without losing my breath, and there are some good hills in there! I can clean my house and not feel like I am going to die. I can lift my 22 lb niece over my head 25 times and still have use of my arms afterward.

2. I have managed to keep up with my cardio. Weights have fallen by the wayside, but maintaining my cardio has helped me achieve everything in item 1.

3. I have always struggled with wanting to do things... mostly because I just didn't feel up to it. I didn't feel like I could do the dishes, because my back would hurt. I can stand at the sink and do my dishes now like it's nothing. This seems like such a small thing, but for me it's huge. Especially because I hate doing dishes. However, now I find myself thinking, "Man, those dishes are bugging the crap out of me!" and they get done.

4. I can play with the dog. Do you know how nice it is to be able to play with Mocha without being afraid I am going to get hurt? Yeah, it's not fun when I trip over her, but you know what I've noticed? If we had her a year ago and that happened, I would have been in bed for a few days. Not kidding. I had a nerve sack that got caught in between two vertebrae when I slipped a disc in June of 2007. The disc went back in. The nerve sack didn't. I thought for the longest time that I was going to end up on crutches or in a wheelchair. I was in such excruciating pain. I was able to get some pain and cortisone shots in my back though, and everything finally went back into place. Then Mike and I started working out. Thanks to that, I can trip over Mocha and recover in seconds.

5. For the most part, I enjoy being up and around others now. That was a big challenge before, when I was in so much pain I just wanted to crawl into a shell and never come back out.

I guess the biggest thing I am saying is even if the scale or your clothes don't show any difference right now, think of what you could possibly be doing better, or more of, and add that to your list of accomplishments. As long as you are moving and improving your everyday condition, don't worry about anything else. Think about the positives and slowly you will find yourself wanting to do more... and actually feeling good while you are doing it.